Tuesday, October 30, 2012

There's A New Kid In Town

A couple weeks ago I was driving down my street one night when I spotted the sickest lowrider parked up the block. Glancing in my rearview to make sure no one was behind me I screeched to a halt, took a quick look around and hopped out to examine it. Glossy white and resting just above the ground, this meant only one thing: hydraulics. Now I'm no car aficionado, but I am kind of a 90's rap buff *hangs head in bewilderment* so I snapped a quick pic before jumping in my car and going inside.

I've always wanted a ride in one of those things. Bouncing cars are the jam!

It must have been a few days later when I went downstairs to grab the mail, opened the door and came face to face with this business:


Uh hello! It lives on my street?!  Operation Meet The Neighbor in full effect, I ran back upstairs screaming to Chris, 'LOWRIDER AT 12 O'CLOCK. I'M GETTING A RIDE IN THAT THING!!'

Chris: 'Go out there and tell him we think his car is cool. He's going to think it's cool that someone on this street doesn't mind when he starts that thing up and sets off all the alarms and carbon monoxide detectors.' Me: 'What if he thinks I'm a crazy old lady?! I can't do it. YOU DO IT.'  That didn't happen.

Every once in awhile I see the kid in the street. And I know he sees me staring at the car because it's right out my office window and let's just say I'm not shy about gawking out there. In fact we were in the street at the same time once when I was looking after the neighborhood stray cat and he was polishing the car...but I was more concerned about the PITBULL OFF THE LEASH AT HIS SIDE that day.

Maybe this wasn't going to work after all?

This past Friday I went to a local restaurant/bar that just opened by my house. It's a little upscale, great food and a pretty decent cocktail menu, too. The place was jammed so we found a spot at the bar and ordered instead of waiting for a table. Two guys pulled in next to me and my friend and, after they'd had a few more drinks, one started talking to us. Throughout the night, he got all up in her business. Not in a hitting on her kind of way, but like a nosy kind of way.

The next thing I knew he was eating off our dessert plate. Uh, what the hell? I guess I'm done then...

Before long, he starts asking me how long I've lived in the neighborhood. I tell him about 10 years and, in an act of what I'm guessing must have been neighborhood knowledge superiority, he begins ID'ing everyone around the circular bar area providing way more information than anyone needs to know. I'm talking name and history of about 90% of a place that was pretty packed with people. Can you say uncomfortable? Throughout the evening I met a bunch of people who, I come to find out, have lived around me for quite awhile. But I didn't feel good about everybody knowing everybody, many of them badmouthing each other as soon as the other's back was turned. It was stomach turning and by the end of the night I couldn't get away fast enough.

Growing up in a small town, there are some things I miss and most others I am very glad to have left behind. Gossip definitely falls in the latter category. I've realized I don't really want to be known by anyone in my neighborhood. As soon as you become familiar with people in any smaller area (even within a larger city), you become fair game for exactly what I experienced on Friday night. Not my bag, not my bag at all.

So, with that in mind, I've decided to enjoy the lowrider from afar. I'll say hi in the street, give a friendly nod of the head but that's it. If the kid offers to take us for a ride in a pitbull-free car I'll go (with glee!),  but there will be no barbecues or sharing of information. And actually, that's kind of just sad. That you have to be this careful about what you share with others. Sad but unfortunately true that adulthood has proven to be a grown-up version of childhood.

20 comments:

Katie said...

Making friends with the neighbor might be worth it, just for the ride. We don't know a lot of our neighbors and I'm perfectly fine with that.

this free bird said...

Holler on that one. The gossip factor is icky!

One thing in my favor: the kid might just want to show off his car to us. He is really proud of it!

Dancing Branflake said...

Haha! Oh man... you are hilarious! I bet you guys are going to become besties. You have to be, right?

Corey Thompson said...

ummm you had me at lowrider (You can take the girl out of Tacoma...) but you lost me at Pitbull, only because one tried to chew michaels leg off and in my job every drug dealer has one to protect the goods... In the meantime get the sknny on the neighbors but don't let them no any more about you than the fact that your an ex foreigner who collects cats... And scene.

Polly said...

Damn that's a car!

this free bird said...

Corey--dude. It's a dream machine. The kid's a cross between Eminem and today's Bieber. He wears white socks pulled up to the knee, big shorts going below the knee, white t's and a hoodie over. Sometimes a beanie. I keep waiting for him to start rapping Slim Shady. If Dre pulls up IT.IS.ON.

Oh and he has a weiner dog to match the pit.

All this I've gathered via looking out the window throughout the workday.

BUT those cuckoos from Friday night sealed the deal for me. NO MAKING FRIENDS AROUND HERE. Should have learned that a few years ago from muppet head and her crew.

Word.

bestie said...

well said, my friend and 100% true!

MerciBlahBlah said...

Lowriders ALWAYS remind me of the movie Dazed and Confused, back when Matthew McConaghay looked like a total dork and said, "All right all right allll riiiiiight..." I say just enjoy it from afar. Have a good one mamacita! Glad to see you blogging again!!!

Courtney Erin said...

That must have been really uncomfortable...I've been in situations like that and it's just straight up icky.

Courtney ~ http://sartorialsidelines.com

RosaLovesDC said...

Wow! That's crazy! I am the same way, I don't know my neighbors and I want to leave that way. I learned the hard way and it was not pretty. Gossip among neighbors is the worst and I am ok not knowing the people who live around me.

Callie Grayson said...

Wow, sorry you had to experience that. I can't believe he ate off your dessert plate. Now that is really rude.
Xx
Callie

Lena at A Crimson Kiss said...

We've only had one pair of genuinely enjoyable neighbors–but we've wisely kept to ourselves otherwise because I just don't need to know.

Josie said...

Uhhhh, those dudes sound weird and creepy. I'm so glad that I go to a school and have lived places where not everyone knows everything about each other -- it's so high school-esque.
xo Josie

Amber said...

Kevin and I keep to ourselves as well. Its a habit we picked up living in NY when saying hello is even gawked at. Its suited us just fine in the burbs too which I've found to be way more gossiping. Gosh, will high school ever end?!?

Jessica said...

People never do grow up, huh? It's really sad that there's never a shortage of gossip.

LyddieGal said...

that is a very cool car, and it's a shame we can't be neighborly without being shallow and catty.

Hope you do get a ride it in someday, and I really hope the owners pit is well trained.

Ashleigh said...

Sad but true indeed, as much as I try to convince myself otherwise. I do hope you get offered a ride someday, I mean, that car is just the coolest! And I just had the biggest craving for LA seeing that pic. I think it's the pretty red/pink flowers that are everywhere. It's just lovely to me.

Fashion Tales said...

Oh goodness, you had me at eating off your dessert plate, that's just too much! lol The car is quite cool though, perhaps you'll get a ride in the future. What an unsettling experience though.

thevitrineissue said...

hey i loved your blog!!beautiful post!! xx

BonBon Rose Girls Kristin said...

There's something to be said for flying under the radar.

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