Losing It - My Balance That Is

Is it possible to have a mid-wardrobe crisis?  I'm still in the LOST version of closet life (no not that closet, the one that holds my stuff) and have thought more than once that maybe this is like a mid-life crisis only of the apparel kind.  Hmmmm.  The fog did lift temporarily when I heard the magic delivery man scream out early this morning, "UPS FRONT DOOR!".  I, in turn, screamed, "CHEF, UPS FRONT DOOR!!" in a zombie-like state from my bed.  What?!  It was early (read before 10am), and I have no business scaring anyone who is gainfully employed with the way I look prior to noon.  Halloween's on Sunday.

It all started when I saw her wearing them here.  Carey is probably my favorite blogger out there - she and her husband, Rob, have the most witty, entertaining posts with the best outfit and cat pictures evah!  And you know how I am about the cats, people!  When I saw her in these shoes it was a like the light bulb went on and whispered, "must-have" ever so softly.  Since then I have been fighting the ol' Jessica Simpson Dany's tooth and nail with excuses like, "but they're Jessica Simpson!" (so rude yes, I know), "I'll trip and kill myself in those mothers - no can do!", and "what if I crack my head open?? I'm pretty sure my insurance won't cover that."  Last week I found them on sale and must have purchased them in a white out (just like Dr. Drew says Amber on Teen Mom has when she beats Gary's a** and can't really remember it) because suddenly a UPS shipment notification showed up in my email and there was no turning back.  Thank heaven.

Eight Sixty Faux Fur Vest, Loomstate for Target Tunic, 

Gap Wideleg Denim, Jessica Simpson Dany Platforms

{Free People, PANYC, Motif 56 leather bracelets}

I wasn't kidding when I said hippie mania has taken over my thoughts.

Sadly you can barely see these huge platform babies, but I trust you've seen them
on everyone else and you will be seeing them again here.
  *quintessential late bloomer*

The wood veneers on the platform remind me of the wood paneled wall my grandparents (and then my parents) had on the length of their/our living room when I was growing up.  Suddenly I was 10 years old again.  It was Saturday afternoon and my mom was bringing pomegranates to me and my brother as we prepped for an hour of Stampede and WWF Wrestling where Davey Boy Smith and the Dynamite Kid flung themselves off ropes and beat everyone to a bloody pulp while Macho Man Randy Savage decided whether Elizabeth could be in his corner or not.  Those were the days.  Shoes - good for the memory and the soul.

How To Not Get To Your Friends' Wedding On Time

Normally I would provide you with a summary of the things that occurred over the weekend.  In this case, however, it pretty much consisted of:

1. Slept
2. Assisted the Chef in consolidating 3 closets into 1.5
3. Attended friends' wedding reception

-with 1 and 2 taking up the bulk of the time.  Number 3?  Well, there's the story and it's a horror - really every girl's nightmare come to life, so get ready.

A few weeks ago two of my close friends had a destination wedding in Mexico that the Chef and I were unable to attend *insert sad face here*.  When Saturday rolled around we were really excited to attend the small reception they were having here in California for some of us who had missed their big day.  The gathering was in the late afternoon and it was a perfect, warm summer day.

I laid out a cute dress, a pair of my fancy heels, picked out the accessories and got ready.  Everything was set to go and we were even going to be on time (miracle).  I had my shoes and handbag by the door, and the Chef and I were getting the card and gift together when he said, "UH, don't step there!"  I glanced down and saw some grass on the hardwood floor - that's it, that's all I saw.  I looked away and, when I looked back, thought he had removed it so proceeded to step down....into a pool of clear cat vomit laced with grass.  This resulted in a yelp and a "UGH!! What was that?!?" as I hopped down the hallway on one foot as he hollered back to me, "Didn't you hear me say don't step down?  There's cat barf!  Did you step in it?!?"  By that time I had stepped into the tub - fully dressed, hair and makeup perfect, sans shoes and bag - to rinse off my foot.  I turned on the water and instead of it coming out of the tap, it shot out of the shower head - precisely as I looked up - shooting me in the face, on the hair, and all over my dress.  Destruction on the low seas.

As a result we were 2 hours late to my friends' reception.  We missed the pre-food visiting, the dinner, and the video of the wedding.  Isn't that special?  Not so much.  Note to self:  carefully check bathtub faucet settings the next time you step in cat barf on the way to a special event.

The injured party.

In short:  "traumatized".

I scrubbed my feet for 15 minutes.  I mean I did have to take a shower again anyway.

 Congrats Danny & Nicole!

Do you ever feel like every day/night is a full moon and every card in the deck is the Joker???  Oy

Hope you had a much smoother weekend filled with zero mishaps and/or yucky cat dealings.

Outfit details:  Loomstate for Barneys Dress, Miu Miu Heels, Melinda Maria Assorted Bangles